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Perfectionism
Perfectionism. Does the word bring up positive or negative connotations? After all, someone who is a perfectionist is known for meticulous, accurate work. Being attentive to detail, the perfectionist makes his work sparkle and shine and ultimately spell, Professional.
So what’s wrong with being a perfectionist? While the attributes listed above are praiseworthy, they can get in the way, especially if allowed to run rampant at the wrong time. The problem with perfectionism is that it’s an elusive, never-to-be-reached goal. No one is perfect and, therefore, perfection is always out of reach. Take it from someone who has been there and tried that. Here’s a definition of perfectionism. I particularly like this one, which comes from www.dictionary.com. Perfectionism: A propensity for being displeased with anything that is not perfect or does not meet extremely high standards.
Without question, the attributes of the perfectionist are of benefit when revising a manuscript. They have no place, however, when writing the first draft. They not only get in the way, but they sabotage your efforts, shouting like a little dictator who sits on your shoulder, hurling criticisms that slap your typing fingers to a crippling halt. I firmly believe that "writer’s block," that frozen state where you can’t seem to move forward, is rooted in fear. There are a number of things that writers may fear, and one of them is writing that falls short of perfection. The fear of lousy writing can paralyze you. So you find yourself procrastinating in whatever way you procrastinate best. Procrastination may serve a purpose. For some writers, their procrastination activities almost become a ritual performed before the real writing. That’s okay, as long as it frees you up to ultimately get past the fear and write.
Perfectionists may make some writing progress, but they’re constantly cleaning up their manuscripts as they write, preventing them from reaching their goal—a finished first draft. All good writers write bad first drafts—a necessary step to end up with better second drafts and terrific third drafts. In Bird by Bird, Ann Lamott writes what has become a mantra among writers: The first draft is for getting it down; the second draft for fixing it up.
This reminds me of a story I'd heard from a friend many years ago. She visited an acquaintance we both knew, who had a young toddler. The entire afternoon while my friend visited with her child, this woman was constantly up and down, cleaning up after the kids. When I say "cleaning up," I mean every time one of the children touched the furniture, she’d immediately bound from her chair, grab a bottle of antibacterial cleaner, then spray and wipe the table free of fingerprints. She constantly followed the children around, spraying and wiping every time they touched anything where their prints could be seen.
You’re probably thinking how outrageous this is and wondering what message this sends to her child. No doubt, such behavior would restrict and stifle the child’s creativity because every time he gets "down and dirty," there’s goes his mom cleaning it up, giving a message of displeasure. It would’ve been far better for the child, not to mention more restful and freeing for the mom, if she’d allow the child the freedom to play, knowing she’d clean up at the end of the day or end of the week.
As strange as this behavior may sound, many aspiring writers treat their first drafts the same way. Every time they spot an error, they stop to clean it up. Once they get a chapter written, they’ll sometimes rewrite that chapter 50 times before they feel confident to go on to Chapter 2. Then they write Chapter 2 and find that some of the newly written details in that chapter change what they needed to say in Chapter 1. So after having rewritten Chapter 1 50 times, they now go back and rewrite it for the fifty-first time to incorporate what’s necessary from Chapter 2 so that Chapter 2 will make sense. And on and on and on until years go by and they still haven’t completed a first draft. Can you see how this is the same as chasing your manuscript around, spraying and wiping every single time it’s messy?
In 2004, I had a desk calendar with a SARK theme, for those of you who are familiar with the SARK inspirational books. I kept several pages that were particularly meaningful to me. I love the one from Thursday, June 17, 2004:
"There is no control and perfection is arrogant. Practice messiness, letting go, and doing things badly.
"You can reassign your perfectionist to some other area that could benefit from this type of attention."
When my kids were small (and messy), someone said to me that when she sees the mess in her house, it’s a reminder to her that there’s life in her home. When I see the mess in my writing, it’s a reminder to me that my manuscript is living, breathing and moving along. Clean-up has a time and place, but it’s not during the first draft. That’s the time to be as a child who draws all over the pavement with sidewalk chalk. Run through the lawn sprinklers and let your clothes get soaked and your bare feet stained green from the grass. Inhibition and self-restriction have no place. The purpose isn’t to write a terrific draft the first time around, but to get it down until you reach the finish line. Bring out that meticulous editor later, when it’s time for rewrites and revisions.
Maybe you’ll have a burst of inspiration and that inspiration will keep you writing in a flowing manner, but if you wait for inspiration every time you sit down to write, because inspiration feels so perfect, you’ll be waiting a long time. I sincerely doubt you’ll ever finish your first draft if you write only when the muse shows up. Even if you don’t feel inspired, write anyhow. No writer feels inspired all of the time. Will the writing be less than beautiful? Most probably. There will be tidbits that are good that you’ll end up keeping, and plenty that you’ll later cut. That’s okay. You’ll do your rewrites and revisions after you write your first messy, COMPLETED draft.
Happy writing!
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